• Hotmail/Outlook (any Microsoft email services) folks. Microsoft is currently blocking our emails. We have raised a support ticket with them and will update when we can.

    In the meantime it's possible that adding robot@evoweb.uk to your address book/contacts will help and if you're able to switch to a different email provider, that would work fine.

    We have also increased the number of bounce emails we can handle before accounts are marked as requiring verification again to hopefully mitigate the issue a bit as well.

The Random Crap Thread

Nick Cave said:
Wax on...Wax off...
Click to expand...

NewKarateKid.jpg
 
Noted said:
NewKarateKid.jpg
Click to expand...

Is that the Karate kid version of the Titanic?!

If you could pan out of the picture they would be on the front end of the Boat and little Daniel Son would scream 'I am the King of the World!!!!!!'

Apparently Mr Miyagi used to chop Daniel Sons pubic hair into the shape of a tree and he used to call him 'Bonsai Dick' Thats why they never got on together in real life.

You would never think of that watching the films though - the chemistry seems spot on between them.
 
Last edited:
Some parents have been branded abusers because of the bizarre names of their children.

Family Court Judge Rob Murfitt stated his concerns in a written decision after a custody hearing in New Plymouth revealed a couple had named their child Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii.

He was so disturbed at the effect on the nine-year-old that he ordered her temporarily placed under court guardianship so a suitable name could be chosen. "It makes a fool of the child and sets her up with a social disability and handicap," he said.

The girl, who had not had her birth officially registered in NZ, had not revealed her name to her friends. The judge was stopped talking yesterday by Principal Family Court Judge Peter Boshier.

Meanwhile, Registrar General of Births, Deaths and Marriages Brian Clarke released a statement today which said a list of unusual names believed to be registered in New Zealand issued by Judge Boshier's office was incorrect.

"The names Fish and Chips, Masport, and Mower, Yeah Detroit, Stallion, Twisty Poi, Keenan Got Lucy and Sex Fruit have not been registered," Mr Clarke said. Names on the list from Mr Boshier's office that were not corrected included: Spiral Cicada, Kaos, Hitler and Cinderella Beauty Blossom.
 
Some people need their fecking heads cracking open and their brains examined by scientists so we can figure out what causes this stupid illness and cure it.
 
Originally Posted by BobbyBox
By the way - my penis is a darker shade than the rest of my body. Does anybody else have this.

Like it has a little..........I mean big, slight suntan - but it hasn't been out in the sun?

Anybody?
Click to expand...

Maybe you should get this for the girlfriend, might help the colouring:

990138;Warehouse;Warehouse.jpg
 
Soya dud's your spuds....

Too much tofu may affect a man's fertility, according to a study linking soya and low sperm count.

Scientists found that even modest consumption of soya products, such as meat and dairy substitutes and bean curd, can have a significant impact on sperm count.

Men who ate an average of half a serving of soya food a day had lower concentrations of sperm than those who did not.


Sperm count ranges between 80 and 120 million sperm per millilitre (million/ml) of semen for normal healthy men.

But researchers in the US found that among the men they studied, those with the highest soya intake produced much less sperm. On average their counts were 41 million/ml lower than those of men who did not consume soya products.

The scientists, led by Dr Jorge Chavarro, from the Harvard School of Public Health in Boston, questioned 99 men seeking help for fertility problems about their consumption of 15 soya-based foods.

Each man was asked about his diet in the previous three months. The foods included tofu, tempeh, soy sausages, bacon, burgers and mince, soy milk, cheese, yoghurt and ice cream, and other soya products such as roasted nuts, drinks, powders and energy bars.

The scientists varied serving sizes to take account of the fact that different foods contained different levels of isoflavones. A standard serving of tofu was said to be 115 grams, and for soya milk, one 240 millilitre cup. Factors such as age, body mass index (BMI) which relates weight and height, smoking, alcohol and caffeine intake, and the length of time since last producing semen, were adjusted for.

I've been Veggie since I was 13...
 
questioned 99 men seeking help for fertility problems
Click to expand...

Obviously they have a low spermcount, they were having problems to begin with! Didnt they question another 99 men without fertility problems to balance it out?

Dont eat soya or even vegatables, I must have super sperm!
 
ahah
WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS

_________________________________________________________________________

The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, “If you were my husband I’d give you poison.” He said, “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.” “That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

“He had delusions of adequacy.” - Walter Kerr

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” - Winston Churchill

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” Clarence Darrow

“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” - Moses Hadas

“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” - Mark Twain

“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” - Oscar Wilde

“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend…. if you have one.” - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second… if there is one.” - Winston Churchill, in response.

“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” - Stephen Bishop

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” - John Bright

“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” -
Irvin S. Cobb

“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” -
Samuel Johnson

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” - Paul Keating

“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” - Charles, Count Talleyrand

“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” - Forrest Tucker

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” - Mark Twain

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” - Mae West

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” - Oscar Wilde

“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.” - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” - Billy Wilder

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” - Groucho Marx
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom